"we are a symbolic group, she says
we hold the values of compassion, care, life itself.
if you get out of your own way, she says, things might happen, and even more quickly
if you step back and watch it, she says
everything falls away, she says,
falling away"
and in response, I wrote this story, that was read out aloud at our showing on 10th June, 2011, in FreeRange, Metro Arts.
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| Brian Lucus, Nikki Heywood and Margi Brown Ash at Process Project Aquittal and sharing...over the finishing line |
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| here we are |
10th June, 2011. My mothers birthday.
we come to the studio this morning. after having a cup of coffee on the footpath talking about the hospice we visited yesterday. the at home hospice whose clients want to die peacefully at home. "if i ever die" i say and everyone gaffaws
if i ever die, i repeat, this time with a grin, and make it to the finish line, i want to be with Karuna, and then we talk about the richness of our visit the stories we heard like the old monk holding a dying woman's hand, whispering the Hail Mary. and we are in the studio and Brian is creating his story of circles and Nikki is on her computer reading the blog (this one--she points to the screen) and I am feeling reasonably lost not really sure how we do this, and how we communicate to you all about the times that we three artists, over a period of 12 months, met with each other, with six meet ups, and ten days and 79 cups of coffee and the occasional red wine...if you had met us back then, when this idea was birthed, you would have seen 3 very different people: i was taller than Brian back then, and we were very very young.
This is not a stand alone project. it is one of multiple dimensions...and she/he/she are dreaming with open eyes...and they remember the story that their mother told them when they were 5.
"once upon a time", their mother said to them "a long long time ago, and only this morning, a little bird sat on your shoulders and whispered into your tiny ears "is this the day you're going to die"
and the children looked into their mother's eyes that had filled with tears and they reached over and hugged their mother and said with a tenderness beyond their years
"mother, lets have an adventure, just in case"
and so the four of them set off to explore the landscapes ahead...they witnessed a large and beautiful lake, with huge birds skimming the surface of the water, they heard 3 kookaburras laughing at them. they sat in the talking circle and shared stories of loss and grief and joy. they saw a sculpture of an aeroplane that looked like a bird, with wings as wide as the path it sat next to.
they saw the white statue of Buddha covered in beautiful flags of yellow and red and blue and green.
sometimes the four of them would stop and look into each other's eyes and smile they didn't have to say anything precisely because their open look said so much.
they decided it was time for tea, so they journeyed towards the house of the spirits, that sat in the valley of the Glass Mountains, and walked windy circular paths towards the small kitchen.
"I will remember this" they all thought. as they witnessed the tables beautifully laid out around the lake and the bamboo stretching high.
"i will remember this" they whispered, when the tasting plate arrived, filled iwth tofu and vegetables and pork and seafood and sauces fit for the gods.
as they drank monk pear tea, the three children looked at the lake and saw the fountain shooting as high as the surrounding bamboo, an enormous spurt of energy...an energy that they could also feel on the inside, particularly when they were together.
finishing their last cup of tea, they continued to follow the circular paths that continued to move them forward.
as they continued to walk, they heard whisperings...they heard
"just get out of your won way. it happens more quickly"
and
"if you step back and watch it, it is easier to manage"
and the message from the little bird continued to sing inside their heads,
"is this the day your going to die"
and after hearing it many times, they realized the freedom that came from it: the way it removed the unnecessary pressure of creating something of importance. Rather, they knew right in that moment, that all they needed was to open their eyes, their ears and their hearts, and watch themselves read.
"its time to go home" says the Buddha, " you can take all of your experiences,with you, to your own homes, and so they journeyd back to where they had started and began to see their own HOME as they have never seen it before.... HOME with bamboo shoots, vegetable gardens and white cane chairs.
HOME with monk pear tea and raisin cake.
Home that is a nest high above the city where he stares out the window and works.
"say my name" we whisper into each other's ears..."say my name, give me tea and raisin cake. and i shall live for as long as you live. i shall be with you always"
and the children noticed that the sky was turning black, and the stars were out beckoning all three of them in different directions...
"good bye" one said, as she stepped ontot he plane to see her other family and continue her list of questions.
"goodbye" one said as he stepped into his white platform shoes, ready to perform
"goodby" one said as she headed to her home, that place of imagination and peace.
And as their mother waved goodbye she knew that she had done something right.
Installation view of 'Figure, Form and Allegory: Sculpture from the Collection' | Photograph: Natasha Harth
Lee Bul | South Korea b.1964 | Untitled (Cyborg hand) 2000 | Hard-paste porcelain, slip-cast, fired to 1555 degrees Celsius and with clear glaze | Purchased 2002. Queensland Art Gallery Foundation Grant | Collection: Queensland Art Gallery
Ah Xian | China/Australia b.1960 | (Disembodied hand, bandaged in lower register) 1993 | Synthetic polymer paint, ink, oil on wooden board | Gift of Nicholas Jose and Claire Roberts through the Queensland Art Gallery Foundation 2008 | Collection: Queensland Art Gallery
Lloyd Rees | Exterior, St. Brigid’s Church, Red Hill 1916 | Pen and ink and watercolour wash over pencil on wove paper | Gift of John Brackenreg 1965 | Collection: Queensland Art Gallery | © Queensland Art Gallery
Lloyd Rees | Self portraits c.1912-17 | Pencil on paper | Gift of Alan and Jan Rees through the Queensland Art Gallery Foundation 1999 | Collection: Queensland Art Gallery | © Lloyd Rees, c.1912–17. Licensed by Viscopy, Sydney, 2011
